Stressmas 2025

As we enter the month of December with huge household changes, I am STRESSED. I made and kept my therapy appointment last week and am still going to try using my coping skills to avoid triggering me too severely, but I also asked about medication, because in this busy time I want to have something as a safety net. I am trying to avoid needing the medication, but I am seeing that I am struggling, and I have reached out for help. Over the Thanksgiving holiday more than one person confided in me that they are also struggling. It was told to me like a secret in one conversation and I felt so terribly for her that she felt shame at feeling the way she was. She was embarrassed that she had to seek professional help. I hated that so much and reassured her that just as you see a doctor when you’re sick or take a training for a new skill, it is mature to seek an expert in mental health when that is what you are struggling with.

Back to me personally, my mental load is HEAVY right now. On top of the day-to-day responsibilities I have, including some HUGE new ones, we now also have the responsibility of creating holiday magic and memories for the children in our home. My to-do list is ever growing. There is always more I need to get done, and during the holidays there is the normal chaos and schedule keeping PLUS holiday activities and traditions.

I have school concerts, class parties, decorating to do, menus and family meals to plan for, gift buying and wrapping, etc. While adding all of this, though, I am still helping with homework, chauffeuring children to activities and practices, keeping up with housework and laundry, making and keeping doctor’s appointments, maintaining contact with teachers, and so, so many other little daily tasks that just come with being a parent.

It is exhausting and overwhelming, but I would not trade it for anything or have it any other way. On Thanksgiving, another mom was commenting on how each of my littles had an outfit that had a turkey on it. They weren’t matching, but they coordinated in such a cute way that got me fantastic pictures. For me, that tiny detail of coordinating color schemes for good pictures is just something I do, it matters to me. She said, “You’re just a different breed. I mean that in a good way!” If I had not done this, I would have simply felt like a failure as a mom ALL day. It would have ruined the whole day for me, and it almost did, because I couldn’t find the baby’s first Thanksgiving outfit the night before! Does this make sense? Probably not. My therapist says I need to talk to myself like I would one of my kids if they did something I wasn’t happy with. I am not so good at that. 

All of this is a lot for a person to carry, I know that. I do take on too much sometimes, but I always figure it out because that’s what needs to be done. I also know that some things, like the color-coordinating outfits, do not matter in the grand scheme. This is one example where my crazy and logical brains disagree. 

So, to the fellow parents struggling with their mental health or just being overwhelmed, for the parents carrying too much but making it work for their babies, for the parents that are giving everything they’ve got to make lasting positive memories and traditions: I get it, you aren’t alone in the trenches, even if it feels that way. Call or text a friend, even if it’s a GIF. If you have the capacity for it, go have coffee or lunch with a friend or spouse and vent or avoid all talk of your responsibilities. Whatever helps you blow off some of this steam, do it. If you bother to read this blog, you are already creating a support for yourself. I hope that this can be a place that makes you feel seen and understood. You’ve got this! And if you don’t, that’s okay too.